Showing posts with label roller derby. Show all posts
Showing posts with label roller derby. Show all posts

Monday, March 19, 2012

Queen of the Roller Games - Raquel Welch in "Kansas City Bomber"



Drew Barrymore’s 2009 film Whip It chronicled the tattooed glamor girls of modern roller derby. The real-life counterparts that spawned this movie really skate, block and brawl, but many of them look like retro pinups while doing it. That’s quite different than the infamous stars of the Roller Game of the Week , a syndicated TV show from the late 1960s and early 1970s that featured the Los Angeles Thunderbirds versus an array of unsavory opponents, like the Texas Outlaws and the New York Bombers. A pseudo-sport that combined banked track skating, staged fights and colorful characters ala professional wrestling, roller games blared from many a TV set every weekend. The Los Angeles Thunderbirds were the cornerstone of the league.



The co-ed  T-Birds battled their rivals at the Olympic Auditorium in downtown L.A. This venue is pretty grimey now: I imagine it was even scarier when the T-Birds plied their trade.  Roller Games’ stars included the T-Birds Shirley Hardman, a burly woman with a blonde pony tail who often chased opponents around the rink with a baseball bat; and “Psycho” Ronnie Rains, who was known to wear a  WW II German Kaiser helmet while skating from time to time. It was all part of the shtick, of course and the fans loved it. Play-by play announcer Dick Lane ( the first sports announcer to use the phrase “Whoa, Nelly!!) and Bill "Hoppy" Haupt described the action.  Every Sunday night, my brothers and I gathered around the TV set and rooted for the T-Birds to squash the opposing team. The skaters’ antics got us so riled up we would often throw chairs around the basement in a hyperactive frenzy. Luckily, no one was hurt during the viewing of the program.


Eventually, the Roller Games caught Hollywood’s attention. Raquel Welch starred as the Kansas City Bomber in MGM’s 1972 skating drama. Lacking the poignancy of the The Wrestler, another film about a “staged” sport, or the good-natured girl power of Whip It, 1972’s Kansas City Bomber starred Welch as roller derby skater K.C. Carr, who is booted from  the Kansas City Ramblers after losing a match race with another skater. She is traded to Portland, where the team’s lecherous owner ( Kevin McCarthy) takes a fancy to her. The single Mom of two becomes the team’s reigning diva and a fan favorite. The other female skaters don’t take kindly to this, particularly the eternally soused Jackie Burdette, played by Helena Kallianiotes. Burdette is K.C’s mortal enemy and opponent in the pivotal match race at the end of the film. Kallianiotes earned a Golden Globe nomination for her portrayal of the troubled, has-been skater. K.C. befriends a country bumpkin male skater, played by Norman Alden, whose attempts to impress K.C. (and become a more “colorful” skater) end with a violent, on-track meltdown.




The final version of Kansas City Bomber was derived from an original script by UCLA film student Barry Sandler. He wrote the script after watching a T-Birds match at the seedy Olympic Auditorium. His original concept was more complicated than what finally made it to the screen, as he explains in the above-posted YouTube video. The final script, less daunting and adapted for mainstream audiences, debuted in theaters in August 1972.


K.C.’s Mom watches her kids while she travels around the country, skating and brawling with the Roller Games. There’s only one short scene of K.C. with her children (her daughter is played by a young Jodie Foster), which ends with her son  running away from her and her mother berating her lifestyle. The reason for K.C.’s marital status is never fully explained, so we know very little about what brought Welch’s character to this point in her life. Still, Welch plays K.C. with a mixture of independence and vulnerability that  might surprise some viewers who expected  her emoting skills to begin and end with “sex symbol.”

Many  professional Roller Games skaters appeared in the film, including Patti “Moo-Moo” Calvin, John Hall and Judy Arnold, lending it an aura of authenticity. Welch  held her own against the skating pros, even doing some of her own stunts. She suffered a broken wrist after one stunt, which delayed filming for several weeks.

Given the nature of roller games in the 1970s, it’s surprising that there weren’t more movies about it. The subject seemed ripe for the low-budget exploitation craze of the time. Later that year, the American International comedy Unholy Roller was released - aside from that, the roller derby didn't make a big impression on filmmakers at that time.  I’m surprised there wasn’t an ABC Movie of the Week based on Jim Croce’s  song Roller Derby Queen.


Kansas City Bomber
is a engaging movie about a faux sport we’ll never see quite the same way again. It stays true to roller games in all their grungy, bargain basement glory. The everything but the kitchen sink plot takes up time that could have been better spent on more banked track action, but it’s just as entertaining as any other 1970s B movie. But be forewarned, guys, its not as sleazy as you might expect. The DVD release is rated  PG,  as there was only one, non-explicit shower scene and some swearing.





























Friday, October 30, 2009

Book Review-Fat Guys Shouldn't Be Dancin' at Halftime


I know, I know. Why are you reviewing a book by a Chicago sports guy on an entertainment blog called The Slums Off Hollywood Boulevard? I was born & raised in Chitown, and before I hit puberty and discovered rock 'n'roll, I was a grade school tomboy who cut class to watch Cubs games. This book brings back a lot of those early sports fan memories for me.

Every city has its local celebrities. These folks are local newscasters, DJs, TV show hosts, athletes and they have a longer shelf life than most national celebs. This type of fame usually doesn’t translate well from one region of the country to another. A local New Yawk type might be too real and down to earth for the surf and suntan crowd in Laguna Beach. Some local icons do cross over to the national spotlight, getting their act known to fans of a certain “niche.”

In Chicago, some of its sportscasters are as famous (or infamous) as its athletic heroes. Harry Caray is the most famous example. Harry even made it to SNL, thanks to Will Ferrell’s colorful impersonation. Chet Coppock, one of Chitown’s longest running sportscasters, made it to the national spotlight several times, as a syndicated sports talk show host and as an announcer for the World Wrestling Federation and the Roller Derby.

After almost 40 years as a sportscaster, Coppock has written his first book, Fat Guys Shouldn’t Be Dancin’ at Halftime. It’s divided into 100 ultra-short, stream of consciousness chapters about every facet of Chicago sports you can imagine. Chet leaves nothing out, even dedicating chapters to Northwestern football, Cog Hill golf course and long defunct (or long ignored) franchises like the Chicago Fire and the Chicago Sting.

Chester isn’t one of those sportscasters who just rattles off statistics. He’s a genuine Chicago sports character himself, just like Ditka and the’85 Bears. Chet praises and lambasts local execs, coaches, fans, and other sportscasters in his indefatigable, rapid-fire style, which translates surprisingly well to the page.

Pro sports are part of the entertainment biz and Chet dissects the good, the bad, and the ugly with pithy observations. In one example, about Cubs player turned sportscaster Ron Santo, (who is given to malapropisms and once had trouble pronouncing the word fuchsia on-air,), Coppock writes, “Ron and the English language haven’t had that dinner they’ve been talking about.”

There’s a section called “You Call These Sports?" Here Coppock reminisces about covering the Indy 500, the WWF, the original Roller Derby and other sports of questionable repute. (Yes, Coppock was there during the halcyon days of the T-Birds and the Pioneers. As proof, there’s a YouTube clip of a very young Chet interviewing Joan Weston and Tonette Kademas.) About the current Windy City Rollers team, he says “The old roller derby was a con, a play for laughs. The Windy City Rollers, so help me Midge “Toughie” Brashun, are completely on the level. The fact is, they beat the living hell out of each other and generally go get loaded.”

The “Fat Guys” of the title refers, in part, to half-time entertainment at Chicago Bulls games these days. Apparently, the Bulls have funny dancing fat guys as half-time entertainment in addition to the slim, female Luvabulls cheerleaders. Fat Guys is a fast and fun ride through four decades of Chicago sports history.